Face to Face with a Nightmare!

FACE TO FACE WITH A NIGHTMARE!

Seeing into the eyes of a Pedophile

 

I happened across the WWYD (What Would You Do) series on YouTube, and for about a week I was so into watching it.  The show What Would You Do is by Dateline NBC, they create scenarios in public with actors to see, what the average everyday person in public would do if a particular situation arose.  Would they help out, make a statement, stand up for someone, stay quiet and why would they do, what they did.  I found it very informative, how they public reacts to people because of age, race, sex, the way they are dressed, body stature, size,  if they look mean or not etc. 

This show is very uplifting, when you see them create a scene in which a child is being treated unfairly, a woman obviously abused is in public with her abuser, people who are drunk trying to drive away.  The way the public sometimes bands together to stop injustice or to help a stranger they don’t know is a actor for the show.  It can be very touching, something happened on the show that took me back to a few years ago when I had a What Would You Do moment.

It was more than a few years ago… more like 9 years ago.  I was doing something quite normal.  I was out shopping with my daughter who was about 8-10 years old.  We decided to wander around one of our regular spots in the Bronx, Parkchester Ave by the 2 line.  We went to check out some sneakers at foot locker, we then did some browsing at the pet store to see the animals, picked up some supplies, then went next door to the Burger King.  I don’t particularly like Burger King but they have a play area and what kid you know doesn’t want to play in the play area right?

What I liked about this burger king was there was a sectioned area a few steps up that had seating right by the play area with about six tables so you can watch your children right through the door of the play room.  The rest of the dining area was a few steps down and out in the open.  Before we eat, I tell my daughter to go play, and she is just enjoying herself when another mother arrives and makes her way to the same area.  We mothers think alike; let’s grab a table by the play area.   She lays all her bags down and seats her child in the seat.

The mother was about my age, she was Spanish in nationality, not sure what kind, nice looking with a pretty cute Spanish little girl about 4 -5 years old.  I smile at her while she told her daughter to stay right there and not to move.  She walked about 15 feet over to the wait in line and order.  I then engrossed myself into my cell phone playing a game.  That is when I came face to face with a nightmare.

Being a New York native there are certain things about me since childhood I was taught by my parents actions and my environment.  I want to have my back to the wall so no one can come up behind me.  I made sure I not only picked the door closest to the playroom so nothing can come between me and my child, but also because it was a few steps higher up from the rest of the dining area and I can survey and see everything around me and out in front of me.  An added benefit was that I had no plants or other décor blocking my view (all of that was over to the side).  I don’t think about it, I do this naturally years of training have a way of influencing a person.

While I play a game on my phone,  I like most moms watch everything out of my side eye (peripheral vision).  That is when I see a man who was all the way on the other side of the dining room fold his newspaper and head over in my direction. Within 2 minutes of the mother getting in line for food he was on his way over and sat down one table away from the child, spread his newspaper  on the table and began to fake read.

I watched carefully out my side eye faking looking at my phone.  I didn’t want him to notice me watching him.  He glances several times at the child, she plays with a toy.  He folds then unfolded s his paper, I watch.  He glances at the mom still with a few people in front of her.  

I begin to feel the jitters, and my mind races; my mind screams to itself

“THIS CANT BE HAPPENING”!

“THIS IS NOT WHAT I THINK IT IS”!

“PLEASE… don’t let me go to jail today”!

I stop thinking and watch, my insides shake, and I must be on some bad medication, because I feel like a drug addict itching for a fix, only I’m not taking any medicine and the fix was to hurt this man.

“STOP JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS”!

Still I fake my game play while watching this man.

After a few glances in my direction, he doesn’t pay me much mind…  I start to take down mental notes of what he looks like.  Spanish man, late 40’s, dark hair straight with a wave, mustache cut a bit old fashioned, light skinned Hispanic could pass for white.  He speaks in Spanish to the little girl…

“Hello”.

She looks at him looks at her toy.

“What’s that”  He says as he folds his newspaper up.

She waves her toy at him, showing it.

Everything in my brain is screaming to say something, but I want proof, I want to know this man means to take this girl before I say something.  He could just get up and walk away.

He moves closer to her and says…  “Come here” while motioning to her and moving closer.

That was all I needed.  What are you doing? I ask with a strong voice

He snaps his head in my direction and we stare straight eye to eye.

You know what it’s like to look straight into the eyes of a pedophile?  I mean a real take your babies from you while in burger king pedophile?  A nab your kid from you while your head it turned pedophile?  I saw what I can only explain as dead eyes. Almost like he was in a hypnotic state and I shocked him back to reality. Emotions did register yet.

Being a mother I had so many things on my mind.  My child was literally five feet from me to my left.  This little girl was five feet from me to my right, and I was locking eyes with a man who crossed 20 feet of dining hall to get this child. 

He positioned himself in a similar way to the way I was.  Only my view point was to survey the area for safety and his was to look for a child. He picked a seat where he could survey the whole dining hall especially right across from the elevated play ground area and the seats which were there.  From his view point you can’t see the child sitting with the bags surrounding her.  The playground seating was in a semi circle she was hidden from sight by the wall with boxed plants (the Décor).   He was watching waiting for the opportunity, a mother getting food while her child sat.  He had to have been watching the mother enter and then waited for the chance.

I don’t know what kind of look I had on my face, but suddenly I saw fear in his eyes.   I saw guilt, I saw the OH SHIT I GOT CAUGHT LOOK! I realized how dark his eyes were and made a mental note of that. He then moved back to his seat looked down and folded his newspaper more and began to stand up.   I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, I wanted to grab the chair next to me and beat him with it.  I wanted to choke him, I wanted to scream, I wanted to smash his face.  I wanted to dig those dark eyes out of his face.  But instead I sat there hands gripping the table, when my daughter comes out of the playroom and the man leaves quickly.

Mommy, I’m ready to eat now.  She said.

Ok you sure you don’t want to play more?  I say trying to hide my distress.

She thinks and says ok just a few more minutes.  As she runs inside to slide the slide a few more times.  I breathe a sigh of relief.

I ask the little girl if she is ok.  She nods at me and continues to play with her toy.

I was nervous, I was looking for him but he was gone.  I realized how fast this all happened it wasn’t any time at all and he was trying to take this child.

When the mother comes over with their food I tell her what happened.  She was so thankful and touched her child with concern.  I said please no matter what don’t do that again if I wasn’t paying attention or wasn’t here anything could have happened.

When I got home I called my local police station but since he didn’t try to take the child or rather I stopped him they could do anything.  They can’t take a description put up a poster or anything.  I was furious then I blamed myself.

I could have done so many things but the presence of the children made me not get loud or violent.  I should have called the police.  Let him touch her or try to take her first.  I should have screamed for them to not let him get away.  I should have held him down.  All the ideas came out of me of what I should have done.  But I was frozen,  I don’t think I really could believe I was seeing what I was seeing,  I was scared I would scare the little girl and my own child.  I was scared I would try to hurt him if I stood up and I would go to jail.  I just held the table and spoke up but I let him get away.  I LET HIM GET AWAY!

I did stop him from touching/taking this little girl but he is out there to watch and wait another day and I think about that sometimes, sometimes more than I wish to over these past 9 years.  Why the police couldn’t at least take a description and compare it to the sex offender list in the area was because I didn’t call them at the moment and report it.  I didn’t detain the man and more so I didn’t let him try to take her away.  If I had let him try and then stop him I would have proof to get him arrested.

It only took 60 seconds from the moment he sat down to the moment he moved in on the child. I guess I know What I Would Do in this situation, still I feel like I didn’t do enough.  But at least He didn’t take a child on my watch.