Nowadays there are more slang terms than I remember when I was younger. Some of them I really dislike. I participated in speaking slang with my friends as well, and some of those old slang terms are still part of my vocabulary.
I love to "Hang Out" and "Chill" with my friends. I think that some things I see when shopping are "Fly". When talking or chatting with others I "feel" what they are saying, I say "I hear ya" that means I understand. If a buddy tells me a story sometimes I think its "Cool" or "Kool". And I am pretty sure for the rest of my life, when someone has been kind to me or touched my heart, I will tell them "Thanks for the Love". But in general between the slang terms I may use on any given day. I speak mostly understandable English. Other than having a New York accent I am a normal person who speaks normally.
Yes, every generation has there own terms, new found Ebonics, that are created and used. They have greetings and goodbyes. They have ways to express themselves uniquely. But some of these terms just do not sit well with me.
The Term I want to speak about today is "Yo Holla at Your Boy", why does it bother me let me break it down.
Yo - Yo is a way to get someones attention similar to Hey. I never liked someone saying Yo to me, especially since it is often used in a loud angry/startling voice. Hey is tolerable but in the end I prefer excuse me.
Holla - This term really bothers me because I don't holla. I am not an animal nor am I out of control hollerin/hollering. Why any man would want another person (especially a woman) to holla at him is beside me. While I know people are going to say "Oh that is not what is meant". Really what do these words mean?
Dictionary.com - Definition of Holla: A cry for attention, or of encouragement ; to shout ; a very loud utterance (like the sound of an animal).
When I think of the term holla it reminds me of Howler Monkeys. I don't know any man or woman who want to be compared to a animal, never the less a monkey whose loud annoying unbearable gruntal scream is proven the loudest noise a land animal can make.
Wikipedia: Howler Monkey Communication: As their name suggests, vocal communication forms an important part of their social behavior. They have an enlarged basihyal or hyoid bone which helps them make their loud vocalizations. Group males generally call at dawn and dusk as well as interspersed times throughout the day. The main vocals consist of loud, deep guttural growls or "howls." Howler monkeys are widely considered to be the loudest land animal. According to Guinness Book of World Records, their vocalizations can be heard clearly for 3 miles (4.8 km). It is hypothesized that the function of howling relates to intergroup spacing and territory protection, as well as possibly mate-guarding.
So when men ask women to Holla at them, why are they surprised when they receive a woman who is going to Holla. Make loud unruly noise and scream in his direction until it is unbearable? You get exactly what you ask for guys. Many women who are respective to men who speak in this manner regularly and direct this manner of speaking to them are usually the type who would holla at you in the street as well as at home.
Boy - Last and not least boy. If you want to call yourself a boy and degrade yourself go right ahead. Remember later on do not expect to be treated and respected as a man. When you yourself proclaim you like to be hollered at and that you are a boy. You will be treated as such.
The only time a man will refer to himself as belonging to a female and being her boy is when he speaks of his mother. A man will always be his mothers boy for the rest of his life. So guys do you want to be men or are you looking for a woman who is going to play your angry hollerin mother while you remain a child?
This is all going to come down to preference, there are plenty of women who go for that "Yo Holla at Your Boy" thing. But in reality most women who respect themselves and want a man they can respect as well, do not find this term or extensive slang attractive. Women who understand what a man is and how he behaves, will never respect one who refers to himself as a boy and says Holla after he screams Yo to get your attention. It is usually an instant turn off.
From the June Issue of www.LargeInCharge.com Magazine
The Raqui-ism column
Raqui, first of all your point is very well stated. I think what I am getting from this article is a call to order. I think more than just the phrase itself you deliver an important argument about how men address women. It is important that there is some level of respect in the way we speak to someone we hope to meet. But, the ownership for bad slang as an introduction to courtship is not monopolized by the men alone.
ReplyDeleteIf the mating call for the Howler Monkey male is, “Yo Holla @ ya Boy” then the Howler Monkey female response to the mating call is, “Aight!” LOL. That should also be addressed. My beef (old slang) is not with the term she uses in response but more so the fact that she deems his call as acceptable.
Moving in unison men and women of the younger generations decide what style of communication is correct for them. The quality of communication seems to deteriorate more and more as we go along. I remember a time when “YO!” never yielded a positive response from a girl on the street. But things are changing. Your article shines a light on the bad way people interact. You illustrate this well with the shouting primate comparison. We need to get back to basics, rules of etiquette, charm school level mannerisms, and most of all respect.
I've never liked that phrase either. I don't "holla" at a man I'm interested in. That phrase is just as bad as "Yo can I get at you?" Yuck!!! lol
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